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And the LORD God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." Genesis 2:18

Some Bible translations say God will "make him a help meet" and this is actually closer to the Hebrew word than helper; but it's real meaning is still cloaked in the loss of meaning in translations.

The Hebrew word by which helper or help meet is translated is 'êzer which actually means "help by resistance". This is why some translations use "help meet". The meet is a meeting or opposition in the helping.

If you've not read In the Beginning then I would encourage you to do so before continuing here as it will help you understand what's being discussed.

We understand the "help by resistance" to be true based upon the curses. As you will read in the next section of this study, every curse God names is one that shows a distortion of His original intent that was already named; and this is no different.

The reason God said it was not good for man to be alone is because
man was created in God's image. The meaning of this image, deeper study in the link provided, is God's character portrayed. God's character cannot be portrayed with man by himself, he must have a help through resistance.

God said He would make ha'adam a partner that would be a help by resistance. When sin happened and God was laying down judgments He tells Eve, "Your desire will be for your husband" 93:16). This doesn't seem like it would be a bad thing but if we look at what is meant by "desire" here we'll see a different picture.

In Genesis 4, we see God consulting with Cain and God tells him, "…sin lies at the door. And it's DESIRE is for you…" (4:7). The "desire for", in context of Scripture, is something which wants to rule over something else. Here, God is telling Eve that she will want to rule over her husband. And we see this curse active and alive in many households today.

When God separated ha'adam (mankind), he took out of iys (man) all the attributes He wanted is issa (woman). We are now two totally different individuals, and we know that because we can never seem to understand the other sex. These differences can either fight against our marriage (under the curse) or we can use them to enhance our marriage.

In the picture above, I have a little example and symbol we have sitting on our cabinet in the living room. It's a reminder of who we are in God. Neither side can stand on its own. And even if you could accomplish it, it takes very little for it to fall. With man and woman together, using their differences that were separated in Genesis 2, they can stand. It's by the resistance they stand. If you lift the side of the woman to provide no resistance, then the man falls.

This resistance is not supposed to be negative. It's only negative is either side is operating under the curse. The resistance is supposed to be a resistance that provides help, like brakes on a car. We would all agree that brakes on a car are good but they are only good because they provide resistance.

I don't make a big decisions without the council of my wife. I may have something I want to do our purchase but I may be blinded by a desire. My wife is that positive resistance that can make me see another picture, another view.

We need to remember that when our wives, and even husbands, offer up resistance, this is a God given thing as long as it's a positive resistance and not either side trying to rule a relationship or situation.